So how did we get here??

You might have noticed that in a period of a few months, we went from "not having the baby bug" to making "the appointment." How did we get there?

Well, Jon has always had the baby bug. It waned a little when he went back to school and was no longer the primary wage-earner, and that's actually when I first started thinking about it. But, school takes a long time, and it didn't seem like a good idea for me to be having a baby, when I was supposed to be the one paying the bills.

However, God has blessed me with a job that will most likely work very well with raising a newborn, and we've waited long enough into seminary that, even if we got pregnant right away, we would only be a few months from graduation when the baby is born, anyway. *Correction: Jon would still have close to another year. Okay, so I was WAY off. But that means he can schedule his classes to have a couple of days off a week, and he'll get Daddy Duty! That's perfect for the days I drive into the office, and when I need a day off! Pair that with a day at Mother's Day out, and I might actually get some work done! :)

Anyway, it was when we realized all that, that Jon and I started to seriously talk about babies. We've had several new parents in our class at church, and a baby next door. None of them gave me a pang that meant, "You could have this!" or anything like that. More along the lines of, "See? This isn't so scary. If your friends can do it, so can you."

And it's true. :) Although I must admit I've found myself a little more anxious since our decision. I haven't worried about raising a baby or being a good mom, but I've worried about our finances, retirement, and further reaching things that are indirectly related to having a child. I've also started doing a lot of research about health during pregnancy, birth options, etc. that seems so diverse I have no idea what's right, and will probably go the normal route just because everyone else does.

So, there are still many questions unanswered, and I don't even need to know the answers, yet. Some I'll find out in April, and others I'll find out along the way.

But for now, yes, we have the baby bug, and it just kind of happened. There's no other way to explain it.

The Appointment

Today, I called the gynecologist to make The Appointment. By that, I mean the one where we discuss stuff like prenatal vitamins and all that. (I'm saying "all that" because I figure there's more to discuss, but I don't have a clue what it is.)

When I picked up the phone to dial, I got the worst case of butterflies to hit my stomach in a long time. I'm not sure, but I think they might have been dragons flying around in there instead of butterflies.

The receptionist answers, and I say, "I'd like to make my annual appointment," and then suddenly my breath leaves me as I try to say, "and talk about having a baby."

The receptionist, who's heard it a thousand times, says, "I'm sorry, talk about what?"

"Having a baby..." I say, only slightly louder. "Do I need a special appointment for that?"

"No, you can talk to the doctor about that at the time of your regular appointment."

As if it were no big deal. As if that one talk wouldn't change the rest of my life.

April 12th, 2:30 pm. The Appointment.