Friday, August 08, 2008

Pervasive: My Two Loves

"Daddy, how do I know when I'm in love?"
"Well, love is...pervasive."
"Oh. Um...okay. Thanks."

That conversation--though I didn't understand it at the time--changed my life. Pervasive: it permeates everything. It's the explanation I've passed on many times to girls asking the same question. When you think about the future, do you think of [fill in blank with potential spouse] with you in everything? Not just running through fields of joy together, but do you think of him as the guy who sits across the table from you every morning, who deals with your imperfections, or who holds your hair back for you when you're puking? That's pervasive. That's love!

My conversation with my dad answered my question--yes, I was in love with Jon, and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.

Now, without realizing it, I find another pervasive love creeping up. A love I really hadn't expected to appear until November.

As I'm sitting in church or talking with friends, I look down at my belly, or place my hand over the spot where Caleb is moving. I drift away into daydreams--taking Caleb to the zoo, rocking him, singing to him, and eventually teaching him to sing and play and be an active little kid.

In these daydreams, Jon is always with me (pervasive, remember?)--my first love together with this new love! What a blessing to be in love!

4 comments:

  1. You have a very wise Daddy.

    What a beautiful post! Brought tears to my eyes. Yay for love!

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  2. OK, yeah, I teared up, too. Just when I think I couldn't possibly love my guys any more, I am amazed by our capacity to give love and experience love, such a gift from God who is Love Himself.

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  3. That is a very neat way to describe love, accurate too!

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  4. And love grows with each addition to your family.

    Caveat: your love for your child can become overwhelming at times. Remember always that your husband is your first and most important love b/c he was there before and will be there after your child has spent his childhood. The best gift to give your child is to love your spouse.

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